Fastest Jet in America

Ok, it is time for a joke, after a brief introduction.

I started looking for one that would be funny and spent the whole evening checking out the website, Will and Guy's Funny Jokes, Short Stories & Amusing Pictures. I had a hard time choosing. Eventually, I settled for this one because it reminded me of a similar situation I experienced when I was working as an airline reservation agent.

"An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!"

My passenger was going to fly from Milan, Italy to New York. She spoke with three different reservation agents (me included). This is what I recall of the conversations that went on:

Passenger: do they have restroom on the plane?
Reservation Agent: yes ma'am.
Passenger: oh good, because when I travel I have to take a medicine that makes me go.

Passenger: how long will it take for the flight to get there?
Reservation Agent: eight hours ma'am.
Passenger: at what time did you say I was going to leave?
Reservation Agent: 10AM ma'am
Passenger: and at what time did you say I would get there?
Reservation Agent: 12 Noon ma'am
Passenger: but how is it possible? you said it would take eight hours.
Reservation Agent: yes ma'am, there is a six hour time difference between Milan and New York
(the agent had to explain three times to the passenger before she finally hung up, only to call back again!)

Passenger: how long will it take for me to get to the airport?
Reservation Agent: it depends at what time you leave and where you live.
Passenger: but how long will it take me?
Reservation Agent: ma'am, it will depend at what time you are planning to leave the house and your starting point.
Passenger: well, I need to know because I have to take a medicine so many hours before I board the plane
Reservation Agent: ma'am, by car it will take about 1 hour and 30 minutes
Passenger: so at what time do I need to leave?
Reservation Agent (now tired of the same question): ma'am, you will need to leave 1 hour and 30 minutes before your scheuled check in time.
Passenger: so what time would that be? (she had already been advised to be at the airport one hour prior to departure - it was still during the old days when we did not have to go through all the security check points).
Reservation Agent: ma'am you  may begin walking to the airport at this time (and the he hung up)

I hope these made you chuckle. It is always good to start the day with laughter.